Your values to success or failure?

In this blog we are discussing values, they are what are important to us.

What motivates you to succeed? Some of us will be highly motivated by success and some of us will be highly motivated to succeed by a fear of failure.

What’s the difference?

Try each of these on to experience which is more you.
How about a motivation which makes you strive and invest energy to avoid or move away from failure, this can feel like on a constant basis.
Or alternatively, be motivated to succeed by focusing on success, (there is no such thing as failure, only feedback).


Motivation is what we get from having our personal values fulfilled. We are driven by values, in other words what are important to us. I have had many clients who have felt unmotivated and lacking in energy for example “I completed the race, I just didn’t feel satisfied” this is related to a value which is being unfulfilled. Think about the last time you felt unfulfilled, what was lurking behind which you were not getting?

Values are one of a group of personal filters, are what we believe are right or wrong, good or bad (rather than what we like). Some of which we are aware of, some of which we are unaware, until we become aware of them. It’s like an iceberg, with only the tip poking above the surface. There are those which we are consciously aware of and then beneath the surface are the ones we are unaware of. Accordingly working with only those at the conscious level will be almost meaningless. For our purpose, we want to go much deeper below the waterline to explore those values held at the unconscious level – those powering motivation.

Where do values come from?

Values can come from those closest to us, for example during our early years (Massy) such as parents, friends and school. Where (geography) we were brought up in can be a source of values such as which part of the country, economics and the media including social media can play a huge part. Just think about the influencing which occurs through social media impacting and shaping our beliefs and values.
Beliefs and attitudes come from our values, so values are really, really important to us. We have different values in all contexts of our life, such as in career, relationships, personal growth, family, health and fitness and spirituality.

At Work

Values in the corporate context is key to high performing teams. Just imagine a team with members aligned to similar or even the same values. Every good leader understands the importance of motivated team members. To know the source of motivation of team members it is essential for leaders to understand their values in order for any change work to begin.

In Career

How can an individual understand and plan their next step in career without knowing their source of motivation, their values? Without this information it can be easy to make mistakes in decision making. The identification of values in career is key to designing a ‘blueprint’ to use as a checklist for reference when considering any next step. Recruiters take note!

In Relationships

Ever hear a friend saying “why do I end up with the same ‘type’?” Understanding values in the relationship context is an essential to finding the ‘right type’. When already in a relationship, identifying values (relating to relationship) in self and partner promotes increased understanding and so valuable to deepening the relationship further or for overcoming any challenges.

Find Out More

To train and learn about eliciting, working with and changing values will enable you to stand out as a coach, exec coach or therapist. Values are covered in our comprehensive Master Practitioner training, places available for our August cohort.

For a chat about what values can do for you get in touch.

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Rod Hahlo

Rod is a Trainer of NLP and Personal Development Master Coach, based in Bolton, Lancashire.

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